In the great words of ???, "This is the beginning!"

I guess this is the beginning.

I have had my fair share of failed blogs. I blog, and blog, and people tire of me and my rants and then I grow tired of the people, and then my blog turns into one big epic fail, and then my life turns into one big epic fail. So I guess the point I am coming to is I am writing this more to get things off my chest than for people to actually read. Don't get me wrong, if you want to read it, that's cool too, but you can't bitch, because that is my job.


So, what is it people do with blogs? Talk about their pathetic, meaningless lives?

I am pathetic, so I guess I am allowed to continue...

Let me start with saying that for every 1 good thing that happens in my life, at least a year of shitty stuff follows. (mind you, it is 0230, and I am half drunk).

For instance, I finally get into nursing school, an endevour that has consumed me for over 3 years, and one that I have been actively applying for, for 2 years only to become embittered everytime I was rejected. But I got in, and a whole lot of shit stopped weighing on me (I mean this figuretively of course). However, now that I got accepted, I ended up in the ER with my mom, I almost got in my first fight, I saw a fat chick give a skinny dude a handy on the subway, and I had to cancel my trip to Trek Expo for my birthday.

Luck isn't something that follows closely with my name. I defintely do not align myself with luck, like I'm not about to ask it to cat sit because luck hates me that much. Most of the time it feels like someone took a piss all over my destiny. I would be stupid to claim that my acceptance into nursing school doesn't make me nervous. Now that I am in nursing school, how in the hell am I supposed to feel secure with my acceptance, because it just feels like it is this wonderful dream that had come true, but I know full well that my dreams always end up treating me like crap and that luck is just waiting to give me an all out bitchslap. These past few weeks seem like an annoying elbow to the ribs, a sort of nagging pain, and I know that I am sure as hell not ready for the full wrath that I am going to have to endure at some point.

Only so much good can happen to someone before they get a rude awakening. Even if they are a good person, luck is never just given away. It is an even exchange, and I can't blame the lady bitch for how she treats me, because she does occasionally bring me the best, only she does come to collect her debts, and in my case she takes interest. She's like a loan shark, or a mobster. She'll help you when you really need it, but you better be prepared to pay her back plus more.

---Wishing I could rid me of this burden of a Lady.